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Build Confidence with Strategies that Really Work
by Peter Murphy
Building self-confidence is of great importance when it comes to developing even better 
communication skills. To expand your circle of friends or to become more successful 
at work you absolutely have to expand your horizons. And that all starts with cultivating ever 
greater self-confidence.
Here are five ways to start developing confidence in yourself...
1. Accentuate the positive.
Be your own best friend. What do you tell a friend who's tried something new, whether or not it 
turned out well? At least you tried something new- good for you!
Accentuate the effort it took in doing something, rather than the final outcome. (You'd do it for your 
best friend, wouldn't you?) We all have limitations. The key is to accept that you have them without 
dwelling on them.
2. Don't be afraid to take some risks.
When you are about to embark on a new experience, do you spend your time worrying so much 
about the outcome you aren't enjoying the moment? If you look at new things in 
your life as a chance to learn something, it opens up the possibility of you becoming good at that 
If you spend your time dreading the outcome, you'll turn any opportunity there might have been into 
a failure.
What's more, we can't grow when we are frozen with fear. 
Don't set yourself up to fail. If you do, look at number one, again!
3. Use self-talk to keep assumptions away.
We all use self-talk. The key is to use it in a way that we don't form bad thoughts that can lead to 
permanent doubts. Catch yourself using negative self-talk and cancel it with something positive and 
not based on assumptions!
Build confidence by not expecting perfection from yourself at all times. You can only do your very 
best at something. Nobody can do everything perfectly, so why do you assume that you should be 
able to?
4. Learn to rely on your self-evaluation.
If you always rely on the opinion of others, you'll always be wondering what they think! That does 
nothing to build confidence - it tears it down, by giving away your personal power to others.
Focus on the real you, inside, to find out how you feel about your own actions, how you've been 
doing your job, etc. You'll be developing a strong sense of who you are.
It's important to remember that no one can be self-confident all of the time. In fact, you'll build 
confidence faster and easier once your realize that.
Most people with low self-esteem or who lack in confidence are that way because of unrealistic 
expectations. They expect more from themselves than they do others.
A person with low self-esteem will think nothing about calling him or herself a 'stupid idiot.' 
They wouldn't dream of saying that to someone else. To build confidence it's a good idea to be 
your own best friend.
5. Pay attention to improving skills and abilities
When you put your focus on the daily improvement of your own skills and abilities you can and will 
grow very quickly. And your confidence will surge.
This is an important point because confidence without competence is a dangerous combination.
Make it easy for yourself and only engage in self-comparison when you are assessing your progress. By doing this you will make it easier to keep at it when the going gets tough and your competence will grow day by day.
Also, do remember I have already given you two more - very powerful, practical ways to feel super 
confident whenever you need to be at your very best.
Peter Murphy is a peak performance expert. He recently revealed the secret strategies all high 
achievers use to communicate with charm and impact. The same techniques you can use to 
overcome shyness, develop great conversation skills and build self-confidence. 


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